Tuesday, 14 February 2017

Thursday, 26 January 2017

Piece Of Paper

Recently, the Ministry Of Education just released the AS/A' Level results, and in no time, it'd be the release of the O'Level results. And here are a few things I really want to say.

Firstly, to all the students who achieved their desired/required grades, a very huge congratulations to you! You've made it! (Shoutout to my homegirl Jade who achieved excellent results, I'm so proud of you, babe)

And to those who didn't,

here's the thing..

Wednesday, 4 January 2017

Things I Learned While Working For A Month

So, in my most recent school break, I took on a 10am-10pm job at a department store. It was tough but I made it through. It was tiring but I held on. I've met amazing people along the way and I am thankful that I had courage to apply for this short experience.

Here are the things I learned and realized while working a 10-10:

Wednesday, 22 June 2016

You're A Closed Book

"For someone who's outgoing and well-known, you sure are a mystery." Anyone who's a closed book would've heard that a couple hundred times by now.

Someone may have randomly stumbled upon you, who changed their definition of perfection, but there's that one problem; you are guarded, you do not talk. (Figuratively, of course)

Perhaps you've given little pieces of yourself to someone until you entire heart are in the hands of another who has the power to hurt you. And maybe you did get hurt. You got manipulated. Got taken for granted. Got used to one's advantage. And since then, you never gamble with your heart anymore. Your books have been partially read, kicked around and mistreated then discarded. So, you adapt to being a closed book.

Someone might come along and sincerely and whole-heartedly want to read you because they see you worthy of investing time in, worthy of loving. But that's not you anymore. You don't do that thing where you open up, let someone in, instead, you push people away, you build walls higher than ever, heart so guarded.

But you know what?

It's not fair to them that some asshole screwed you over before. It's not fair that you gave your heart to the wrong person before someone else can come along to treat you right and disprove the notion that "it always ends the same".

Do not let your past relationships or personal fears keep you from opening up and giving someone a chance. Sweetheart, love is always going to hurt, one way or another. But that's a part of life. You can't cocoon yourself up in order not to get hurt. Fall in love, and fall in love again! Get hurt, and get hurt again. Don't let someone who has ripped your pages off close your book forever.

Not everyone is the same, not everyone will hurt you. How can you be proven wrong if you don't give someone the chance to prove themselves right? It's okay to expose a couple of pages, it's okay to let someone know how you feel. You don't have to bottle everything up.

Think of that girl who always stuck around and tried to read you despite the fact that you've locked yourself up, who try to show you what you're worth. Think of that guy who would go the extra mile to make sure you're okay and to try to cheer you up even though you don't show appreciation.

If you don't allow someone a couple of pages, sometimes their only option is to put down the book. Or they could feel so hurt that they become closed themselves. Life is all about the adventures; taking risks and putting a bit of yourself on the line.

Let that girl who's been melting herself to be the right key fit into your lock, let that guy who still checks up on you although you're always so cold in. It might be a mess, but it could be a beautiful one. Neither of you will know how the story could've been if you don't seize the opportunity. You never know, someone might show you so much love and care that you become whole again.

Only you have the power to let that happen.

So, be more than a cover.

I promise you, it'll be okay.


Friday, 18 March 2016

Be with her because you actually want to be with her, because you actually see a potential future with her, not because you are used to being with her, not because you're scared of the thought that being without them will ruin you. Not because she's good for your ego, and definitely not because she willingly gives you her unconditional love. The point of being in a relationship is to enjoy each other's company, is to be there to support each other when they need it most. And to believe in each other in becoming better people. No one person defines who you are. They can only compliment you.


Thursday, 7 January 2016

All Or Nothing

If you love me
      for what you see,
      only your eyes would be
      in love with me.

If you love me
      for what you've heard,
      then you would love me
      for my words.

If you love
      my heart and mind,
      then you would love me,
      for all that I am.

But if you don't 
      my every flaw,
      then you mustn't love me - 
      not at all.
lang leav

Friday, 18 December 2015

True Love

"Growing up, I always thought true love was red roses, dates on Saturday nights, little block box that held expensive things, and always knowing what to say. I thought true love was a kiss in the rain, deep explanations, and the perfect story. But now that I'm older, I've realized it's not like that at all.

Tuesday, 17 November 2015

Thursday, 5 November 2015


I often think that people marionette with feelings, but puppets on strings nonetheless. You start life as a little baby, onto toddlers, then you're made to go to school because 'it's what gets you a good job, secure income, and of course, your future.'

We grow up, get placed into a school which fills us with a large amount of useless information that we may as well never use again in real. In what aspect of life do we apply the Pythagoras' Theorem if your choice of career is a baker or a writer? In what aspect of life do we apply the geographical information we so tirelessly memorized for our exams in if you're not a geologist?

And what will our exam papers prove? That somehow, those with higher grades are considered 'smart', and those who scored a measly 'C' are considered average? But these are standardized tests given to individuals who each shine in different areas.

How is this fair, exactly? 

I consider you smart if you are able to turn time, paint and canvas into something visually breathtaking. I consider you smart if you are able to turn flour, eggs and butter into something that delights taste buds. I consider you smart if you are able to churn out melodious music by simply synchronizing your voice and instruments. I consider you smart if you are able to take 26 letters of the alphabet and turn it into something so pleasing to read -- I really do. 

This is the journal of the girl who thought she had the world all figured out. This is the journal of the girl who, under circumstances, matured more than she ought to. And no, it isn't because she had a tragic past with dead parents, or had a particularly traumatic experience (unless you consider being born into this life), nor is she suffering from a terrible health disease or poverty. 

This is simply the journal of a little girl in a big world who pleaded for ears to listen to the silent screams. This is for all the other kids out there who are unheard in their own world. This is for the broken ones who bravely drew a smile on their mask as I did. This is for those who are holding onto fragile strings; for those slipping down slowly before they fall into the dark abyss.

This is for myself; my sanity - before I break apart.